Dream Journal

I appear to be writing at a desk, surrounded by piles of books. The desk is rather large and made of a deep cherry wood. The sunlight comes in at an angle, reflecting off the pages at my fingertips. Peeking thru the curtains, I can feel the the warmth. I exhale deeply.

“How odd,” I think to myself aloud.
The titles are all blurred as if they weren’t meant to be seen yet.
Some books are sprawled out and I am furiously taking notes.

Maybe an author is what I will become after all. A dream not so lost….


.Lily

Carefree Days of the Past

I’ve begun to wonder once again how people, in general, are supposed to cope with such a thing as cancer.

I have had to struggle with what seems like uncontrollable emotions. Maintaining my classes and my job at the library has been overwhelming, to say the least. This isn’t like me at all… at least not who I used to be, before all of this.

I see others walking the campus grounds, free of problems while laughing and smiling. I remember what that felt like. I want it back! Those days of the past. Carefree and filled with fantasies from my mind.

I feel as if I am failing somehow. A fracture within my mind may be inevitable. Or is this just another distraction to make me think I will somehow fail?


.Lily

Rollercoaster

A phone call from my Dad and my emotions plummet back into darkness.
My Mom’s blood counts have dropped again!!

He says it could be just temporary. Possibly leveling off but not where the doctor would like them to be. This isn’t supposed to be happening!!! She looked so much better just a few short weeks ago!

I was just starting to think it was time to go ahead and publish my ebook.

Maybe now is not the time….


.Lily

A New Year

Being home with my family over Christmas break has been wonderful.
I felt as if I were a young child again. Happy, content, and secure.

I can’t wait to get back to class and get my head back into the game.
A sports analogy, if you would… funny.

I have let things in my mind distract me from my goals, but no longer.

It’s a New Year!

To a fresh start and new beginnings.


.Lily

Dream Journal

I pull the book from the library shelf.

Why am I usually alone in here at the library?

The binding on the book is very old.


It smells of old cologne, like it had lain in a desk drawer or maybe a dresser?

I can hear the crinkle of the pages, as if they would crumble beneath my fingers if I were to flip them.


I begin to read about a man and his story of days of old.

He speaks of a different time and place, one of which I recognize…


How is this even possible?


.Lily

Merry Christmas

I didn’t travel home for Thanksgiving, so my enthusiasm is almost uncontainable. I also feel so grateful to be able to go home for Christmas break.

My mom looks so much better; there is a hue of color to her face now. She has gained a few pounds after gaining some of her appetite back. Even just a few pounds makes a difference. It is wonderful to see her revived anticipation for one of her favorite holidays!

I decided we should make some cookies, like she used to do for me when I was little. We sit at the counter drinking hot cocoa and laughing about memories passed. Dad pops his head into the kitchen, smiles, and winks at me as Mom and I continue on with our conversation.

The doorbell rings and it is Grandpa. Cookies are done. Now we are off to find a Christmas tree. They had decided to wait for me…


Merry Christmas,

.Lily

Dream Journal

I see myself, but I am much older.

I am amongst several hundred people at some type of celebration. They are dressed up in gowns and tuxedos.

Tables decorated so elegantly with beautiful bouquets perfectly arranged. Gorgeous chandeliers and background music as if I were at an opera.

There is a gentleman walking towards me, and he says, “They are ready for you now,” as he takes my arm in his and leads me to the stage.

.Lily